Rethinking RandomWhy You Need A New Map Of The Female UniverseLike Some Guys I Know, You Might Be Tempted To Skip This Introduction And Jump Right To The Sex Chapter And If Youre Chuckling Right Now, It Probably Means You Already Did It Or Were About To Its Not A Bad Choice, Actually Just A Little Selfdefeating If Youve Been In A Committed Relationship With A Woman For Than, Say, A Day, You Know That Going Just For What You Want Isnt Actually Going To Get You What You Want For Very LongA Week, Maybe But Lets Be Honestone Of The Main Reasons Youre Looking At This Book Is Because You Are Trying To Get Something You Want Not Sex Well, Not Just Sex , But A Fulfilling, Harmonious Relationship With Your Wife, One That Isnt Quite So Hard Or Confusing And The Back Cover Gave You The Wild Idea That Understanding Her Might Actually Be PossibleEither That Or For Some Reason The Woman In Question Just Handed You This BookHmmWell, Either Way, Take A Look At The Revelations Weve Uncovered We Think Youll Be Convinced Each Chapter Explains Things About The Woman You Love That May Have Often Left You Feeling Helpless, Confused, Or Just Plain Angry Each Chapter Points Out Simple, Doable Solutions The Only Genius Required Is That You Make A Decision Up Front That Youre Willing To Think Differently This Is A Short Book, But If You Read It Cover To Cover, Youll Walk Away With Your Eyes Opened To Things You May Have Never Before Understood About Your Wife Or GirlfriendEach Chapter Points Out Simple, Doable SolutionsThats What Happened With MeJeff And Im Just Your Average, Semi Confused Guy Actually, Sometimes Totally Confused Is Accurate And Since We Average, Semi Confused Guys Have To Stick Together, Thats Why, Even Though Shaunti And I Are Both Authoring This Book, Ill Be The One Doing The TalkingFirst, Some BackgroundIn Shaunti Published For Women Only What You Need To Know About The Inner Lives Of Men, Which Quickly Became A Bestseller Based On Nationally Representative Surveys, Focus Groups, Personal Interviews, And Other Research With Thousands Of Men, It Opened Womens Eyes To Things That Most Of Us Guys Had Always Wished Our Wife Or Girlfriend Knew Things Like Most Of Us Need To Feel Respected Even Than Loved Or That Men, Besides Just Getting Enough Sex, Also Have A Huge Need To Feel Sexually Desired By Their WivesIm Not Sure Exactly Why, But Women Everywhere Were Shocked And By The Flood Of Letters From Around The Countryfrom Both Women And Their Grateful HusbandsShaunti And I Have Seen How Much Good Can Come When The Opposite Sex Finally Has Their Eyes Opened To Things They Simply Didnt Understand About Us Guys BeforeIn This Book, The Shock Is On The Other Foot Now Its Their Turn To Exclaim To Us, I Cant Believe You Didnt Already Know That When Shauntis Publisher First Approached Us About Doing A Companion Book To For Women Only To Help Men Understand Women, I Had Two Major Concerns First, I Didnt Think Guys Would Read A Relationship Book For Most Of Us, The Last Relationship Book We Read Was In Premarital Counselingand Only Because We Were Forced To But To The Point, I Doubted That Women Could Ever Be Understood Compared To Other Complex Matterslike The Tides, Say, Or How To Figure A Baseball Pitchers ERAwomen Seemed Unknowable Random EvenIm Not Sure Exactly Why, But Women Everywhere Were Shocked By How Men ThoughtI Explained My Skepticism To One Early Focus Group Of Women Jeff Guys Tend To Think That Women Are Random We Think, I Pulled This Lever Last Week And Got A Certain Reaction But When I Pulled That Same Lever This Week, I Got A Totally Different Reaction Thats Random Woman In Group But We Arent Random If You Pull The Lever And Get A Different Reaction, Either Youre Pulling A Different Lever Or Youre Pulling It In A Different WayShaunti What Men Need Is A Sort Of Map To Their Wives Or Girlfriends Because We Can Be Mapped We Can Be Known And Understoodfirm GroundJeff Uh, No See, Guys Think Of A Woman As A Swamp You Cant See Where Youre Stepping, And Sooner Or Later Youjust Know Youre Going To Get Stuck In Quicksand And The You Struggle To Get Free, The Deeper You Get Sucked In So Every Guy On The Planet Knows That The Best Thing To Do Is Just Shut Down And Not Struggle And Hope Somebody Comes Along To Rescue YouWhen I Came To, Shaunti And The Other Women In The Focus Group Assured Meand I Have Since Seen For Myselfthat Guys Dont Have To Live In A Swamp That Realization Led Us To The Eventual Subtitle Of This Book A Straightforward Guide To The Inner Lives Of WomenWe Have Been Astounded And Humbled At The Reaction To These Simple, Eyeopening Truths In Fact, The Book You Are Holding Is Actually The Second Edition Of This Bookwhich Is Needed Because There Was Clearly A Desire For This Ongoing ResearchBoth For Women Only And For Men Only Sparked A Huge Wave Of Encouragement And Hope Among Ordinary Men Andwomen Just Like Me And Shaunti, Selling Than Million Copies In Twenty Two Languages We Were Flooded With E Mails And Comments From Men And Women At Our Marriage Conferences, Saying Things Like This Saved My Marriage And After Ten Years Together, I Finally Know How To Make My Wife Happy And Even Jeff, I Owe You One, BuddyBut Since Weve Continued To Learn New Things, We Also Wanted To Keep The Book Current For This New Edition, We Haveincluded Some Fascinating New Findings, Including The Brain Science Behind Why Women Sometimes Think As They Do Plus Weve Added A New ChapterShes Not Making Sensethat Decodes Those Unpredictable Reactions That She Thinks Of As, Uh, Normal After Seeing The Impact Of This Research, I Realize That We Really Did Uncover Life Changing Insights Surprising Truths That Average Guys Like Me Need To Hear From An Average Guy And Be Encouraged That If Someone Like Me Can Learn It And Do It, They Can TooPraise For For Men Only Once Again Shaunti And Jeff Feldhahn Have Unearthed A Treasure Chest Of Insights That Are Not Only Eye Opening, But Life Changing Andy Stanley, Senior Pastor, North Point, Alpharetta, GA, And Bestselling AuthorIn Our Weekly Couples Study We Read And Discussed Both For Women Only And For Men Only Over The Course Of Several Months They Were Fascinating And Very Helpful The Findings In For Men Only About How Women Think Are So Enlightening My Wife And I Think These Books Should Be Required Premarital Reading Comedian Jeff FoxworthyWhen We Featured Shauntis Books On Family Life Today, The Phone Rang Off The Hook When Shaunti And Jeff Come Back On Our Broadcast, Im Buying Some Phones For Men Only Is Fresh And Relevant Good Stuff For Every Marriage Read It Dennis Rainey, President, FamilyLife TodayIf Youve Ever Asked, Why Does She Do, Think, Or Say That Then Youve Got To Read This Book Shaunti And Jeff Not Only Answer This Question, They Eliminate The Confusion That Has Kept Far Too Many Men From Bridging The Gender Gap Drs Les And Leslie Parrott, Bestselling Authors Of Love TalkMost Of My Work Helping Passive Christian Men Become Like Jesus Involves How Best To Relate To Women Im Going To Make Sure To Keep A Case Of The Feldhahns Excellent Book Handy At All Times Paul Coughlin, Author, No More Christian Nice GuyMen, Were Supposed To Love Our Wives And Live With Them In An Understanding Way Thats The Clear Assignment God Gives Each Of Us In The Scriptures So Buy This Book, Read It A Couple Of Times, Underline A Few Key Ideas, And Then Keep It Where You Can Review It Regularly It Will Help You Be The Husband God Wants You To Be Bob Lepine, Cohost, FamilyLife TodayPraise For For Men Only And For Women OnlyWhenever Shaunti Feldhahn Appears As A Guest On The Focus On The Family Radio Program, We Know That Listener Response Will Be Enthusiastic She Has A Way Of Connecting With The Audience That Is Unique And Compelling Were Thankful For The Unique Perspective She Provides Not Only To The Christian Community, But To The Culture At LargeJim Daly, President, Focus On The FamilyThese Are The Books I Pass Out To People As The Best On The Subject Shaunti Feldhahn Has The Rare Ability To Do Impeccable Research And Then Make Her Findings Incredibly Practical There Is Something To Learn On Every Page Jim Burns, PhD President, HomeWord, Author Of Creating An Intimate MarriageWhatever Shaunti Feldhahn Researches, Read Actually, Do Than Readstudy Shauntis Ability To Ask The Right Questions, Find The Right Answers And Communicate The Results Clearly And Practically Sets Her Apart As A Gifted Researcher Her Content Guides And Changes Lives Emerson Eggerichs, PhD Best Selling Author, Love And RespectShaunti Feldhahn Has A Unique Gift For Helping Men Understand Women, And Women, Men Her Books, For Women Only And For Men Only, Are The Best I Know At Providing Rich And Practical Gender Understanding That Can Be Used Immediately I Highly Recommend Both All The Time Robert Lewis, Author Of Raising A Modern Day Knight Founder, Men S Fraternity


7 thoughts on “For Men Only, Revised and Updated Edition: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women

  1. says:

    I don t know who advised or offered you to read this book, but if you decided by yourself to read itthen you won t be that surprised or learn a lot of things.Most of the little stories lessons told are super obvious at least to me The second part of the book was a lot interesting.My wife is my best friend and I soon realized a lot of things that written here If you happen to have effective communicationin your couple than a lot of what s written here won t surprise you.For Women Only, is I think interesting for women than this book for men. because we men are less and less understoodby women My wife really realized a lot by reading FWO, it wasn t such a paradigm shift for me unfortunately.


  2. says:

    Ils ont vraiment fait une recherche objective et communique leur recherche avec beaucoup de l g ret , c est un plaisir de le lire.


  3. says:

    I ve probably read over thirty marriage books in the twenty years we ve been married, plus numerous blogs and articles Asking my husband what his thoughts and dreams are, what he d like to change in our marriage, etc etc etc Lots of things were helpful But nothing was truly transforming the way this book and its companion, For Women Only, have been.We truly feel like newlyweds again except without any of the painful mistakes that newlyweds make My husband said that this book really opened his eyes to so many things.And, each of us was surprised to know that our inner hurts and struggles were actually very common for our gender It was actually a big relief.Pray for yourself, pray for your spouse, pray for your marriage, and read these books together There is a spectrum for everything so talk about what applies to you and what doesn t.My husband rarely writes reviews on books so I ll recap what he told me about this book Some of the key points in this book I already knew in a vague way after 20 years of marriage but didn t know how to apply that to improve myself And there were a few things that truly shocked me, like finding out you don t know how beautiful you are Or that you wonder, so frequently, if I regret marrying you Now I know what your heart longs for and I will give that to you, every day of my life I will never stop pursuing you Swept off my feet


  4. says:

    I read the For Women Only and decided to read this just out of curiosity Men, I can tell you as a woman that I identified with so many things in this book and felt like yes That is me If you feel like you don t understand why your mother, sister, girlfriend, wife, etc is the way she is, I highly recommend this book It touches on women s insecurities, what security means hint it s not just about the money , how women think and are wired differently than men, what we mean when we say I don t want you to fix it I just want you to listen , women s sex drive and what that means and does not mean about you, and ultimately what you can do to show the woman in your life that you love and cherish her in the way that will make her understand that.Seriously guys, read it Some things may not make sense because men and women ARE different, but this book will help you understand that your lady is not crazy There is a rhyme and reason for how she is


  5. says:

    it s helpful if you like a really man next door author voice definitely take some of his generalizations with a grain of salt, as all women will be different.I gave this to my fiance after reading it and writing notes in it to let him know what did and didn t apply to me, and he really appreciated it.If you think your husband SO will benefit from hearing traditional advice for men like listen before talking, she won t enjoy sex without romance, she has a lot of complicated thoughts in her brain, and women really struggle with body image, so give her lots of compliments, then this is the book for him Fairly Biblical, but if you re a Christian, I might recommend theology based approaches like Intimate Allies.


  6. says:

    As a woman, I thought this book was very validating YAY I may be crazy but all of us women are HAHAHA Just kidding I love us women We are awesome There are some commonalities that we share and it was very validating to understand that I am not the only one who feels this way I recommend the corresponding book too, For Women Only Nicely written and easy to understand It would be helpful if you are in a relationship to have a conversation with your partner about each book for additional insight.


  7. says:

    You know how you go to lectures or seminars or presentations, and it soon all becomes a blur and you don t remember anything But sometimes you attend a lecture or session and you walk away with a nugget of advice or information or two that are really useful and help you in your work or life That s how I felt about this book I read it, enjoying the conversational down to earth style, and walked away with two or three revelations that really did and do help me understand women, and my wife in particular, better That is invaluable.One thing I wasn t crazy about is the reference to religion It s not as heavy handed as in the companion book about the inner life of men, but I very much believe in separation of church and state when it comes to writing self help books.